I did something that was much needed and I did it without really knowing I was doing it. I spend most of last week just watching videos, working out hard and thinking about my life. I spent some time thinking about poker but I also spent quite a bit of time thinking of a simpler time. I miss the days of being driven by music and I'm finding that love again. Music in a way led me to where I find myself currently in my life. Yes I love poker very much and love the freedom it provides but I have a new concept of it. In everything I want I have always wanted to be the best and to get to the top. I realize that I may never tour the world and/or play 500/1000 but I had always aspired for that. What I'm saying is basically that I want a life that is simpler and allows me to be happy. I want to play poker and music and not attach results and let it flow. I think the secret to being successful in anything is doing what you love regardless of the outcome and/or income. So my plan for the year is as follows and no matter what happens I can say I did it and it made me happy.
1. Buff
2. Vegas for 6 weeks
3. Record Music
4. Breathe
Sure I would like amazing results in everything but I would just like to be happy doing them. I want these things to make me happy and serve me, not enslave me as they have before. I truly feel if I detach the result I will have the best possible outcome. Mainly because I'm consumed by the outcome of everything and it's driving me nuts. I have all these results and things I "want" and the way i went about getting them has served me well. Now I am trying a new mindset and feel that no matter what happens, this is the best way I can live for me. I feel we can all have the things we choose but wanting them will only create that result. I no longer want my life but I have and will always choose it.
Happy Trails
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